May The Pork Be With You: Here Comes the Star Wars Porn Parody

The world of the Porn Parody has long held the distinction of featuring some of the greatest, and most creative titles in the entire movie industry landscape. Everyone knows the legend of such tongue-in-cheek (among other body parts) titles as Shaving Ryan’s Privates and Edward Penishands, and now something is even more exciting is happening in the world of filth.

A couple of years back, Kevin Smith’s Zack & Miri Make A Porno focused on Seth Rogen and Elizabeth Banks’ attempt to make a Star Wars based porn flick, and now it seems that reality is about to mimic art with the release of a real XXX parody of George Lucas’ franchise.

And it’s in lurid 3D no less!

The news comes as star Kylie Ireland posted this photo of the construction of a landspeeder on the set – though to me it looks a lot like someone’s just stuck a couple of chairs on a door…


I know the production quality has gone up significantly in this sort of parody recently, but I can’t help but think that only a few years ago, this might have been the finished product. Also, why is it not shaped more obviously like a penis? I think director Axel Braun may have missed a trick there.

Casting is now apparently complete, with excellently named “actors” like Lexington Steele (Darth Vader), Allie Haze (Princess Leia), and Rocco Reed (Han Solo) making up the main part of the cast. There is surely some room to change the character names though (and in all probability LucasFilms will force it to happen), and I would like to suggest the following names for consideration: Darth Laid-Her, Hand Solo, Luke Skyporker, Princess Layer, Jabba The Rutt and Chewbackside. Oh and there’s obviously also the E-Cocks of End-Whore. I have literally thousands of these…
Although, having said that, I don’t think it’s at all okay to have inter-species humping on-screen even in an inter-stellar skin flick parody. The idea of Jabba on Ewok action just turns my stomach.
This isn’t the first time someone’s chosen to dip their creative wicks into the Star Wars universe for a porno reimagining. In fact, past offerings have included Star Ballz, Star Whores and Sex Wars – hardly the most imaginative titles, but I’m reliably informed all excellent at what they aim to achieve. Which, I suppose must be orgasm?
Now if someone could just find it in their hearts to take a further leaf out of Zack & Miri’s grubby little book and follow this particular blue movie with a horrendously genius sequel titled Revenge of the Shit: The All Anal Final Chapter I can die a happy man.
Thanks to the Houston Press blog for the heads-up.