Galactic Bargain Bin: The Delightful Cheese of ‘The Humanoid’

Welcome aboard the SS Nostalgia, destined for the lesser-known corners of the cinematic universe, where “The Humanoid” drifts in a low orbit around the planet of Campy Classics. Directed by the one-and-only George Lewis—who clearly went shopping for his film’s budget in a dollar store—”The Humanoid” serves up a hearty meal of cheese, topped with a generous sprinkle of clichés.

Critics might call it a “Star Wars Rip-Off,” but let’s be real: it’s more like if “Star Wars” went on a bender, woke up in a back alley without its wallet, and had to borrow clothes from a 1970s sci-fi series to make its way home. With its earnest attempt at grandeur on the budget of a high school play, “The Humanoid” is the kind of movie you watch with your friends to revel in its glorious shortcomings, not to explore the outer reaches of philosophical thought.

So, why dive into this treasure trove of tackiness? Because sometimes, you need to appreciate how hilariously wrong things can go when ambition overshadows ability. Let’s dissect this intergalactic oddity to understand how it’s become the cult classic that movie buffs love to mock but secretly can’t resist rewatching during their kitschiest moments.

The Seventies Sci-Fi Gold Rush

Picture this: it’s the late 1970s, disco is king, and everyone’s pants are just a bit too tight. Hollywood is in the throes of a sci-fi fever, thanks to “Star Wars” shattering box office records. Producers and directors are scrambling over each other in a mad dash to cash in on the space craze, and who can blame them? Into this wild west of filmmaking rides George Lewis, armed with a dream and not much else.

“The Humanoid” was his shot at stardom, an opportunity to create a space saga that might stand shoulder to shoulder with the giants of the genre. Instead, it stumbled out of the gate, tripped over its shoestring budget, and face-planted into the muddy puddles of film lore. But that’s exactly where its charm lies—in its spectacular failure to mimic the masters, it became something unintentionally hilarious.

Who’s Who in the Cosmic Zoo

Now, let’s meet the rogue’s gallery of characters that populate “The Humanoid.” Our hero, if you can call him that, is a lab experiment gone either terribly wrong or laughably right, depending on your perspective. Picture a protagonist with the emotional depth of a teaspoon and the charisma of a damp sponge. His supporting cast isn’t much better, featuring a villain so melodramatic he’d be right at home in a soap opera.

These characters deliver their lines with the enthusiasm of someone reading a microwave manual, and the dialogue? Oh, the dialogue is so wooden you could build a fleet of starships with it. Yet, there’s something endearingly earnest about how seriously they take their roles, blissfully unaware of the trainwreck unfolding around them.

Plot? What Plot?

The plot of “The Humanoid” is like a patchwork quilt made from scraps of better movies. Our “plot” loosely strings together a series of events that feel like déjà vu if you’ve ever seen “Star Wars.” But here’s the kicker: every twist and turn in “The Humanoid” is delivered with such ham-fisted seriousness that it transcends its source material and enters the realm of the sublime—or the ridiculous, depending on your mood.

From the convoluted machinations of its cardboard villains to the inexplicable powers of its lead, the story marches on with all the grace of a drunken bantha. It’s a wild ride from start to finish, with plot holes big enough to drive a star destroyer through. But that’s all part of the fun, isn’t it?

Special Effects on a Shoestring

Imagine what you could do with a special effects budget that wouldn’t cover your weekly grocery bill. That’s what the crew of “The Humanoid” had to work with. What they lacked in funds, they made up for in sheer audacity. The special effects are a hilarious highlight reel of how to do more with less—much less.

Spaceships that look suspiciously like repainted toys from the clearance bin, laser blasts that seem to have been drawn in with a neon crayon, and alien landscapes that are clearly just quarries on a foggy day—these are the charming hallmarks of “The Humanoid’s” visual design. It’s a DIY aesthetic that you can’t help but admire, in the same way you might cheer on an underdog at a talent show.

Why We Still Can’t Look Away

Despite its many flaws—or perhaps because of them—”The Humanoid” has carved out a niche in the hearts of those who love their sci-fi served with a side of cheese. It’s the film you pull out when you want to laugh, groan, and remember a time when all you needed to make a movie was a camera, some friends, and a dream (no matter how deluded that dream might have been).

This film teaches us that movies don’t have to be good to be great. They just need to be entertaining. And “The Humanoid,” for all its corny dialogue, shoddy effects, and hammy performances, is nothing if not entertaining. It’s a reminder that sometimes, the best way to enjoy a movie is with your tongue firmly in your cheek.

Conclusion

So, is “The Humanoid” just a “Star Wars Rip-Off? Technically, yes. But it’s also so much more. It’s a testament to the enduring appeal of earnest efforts, no matter how misguided. It’s a cult classic that offers a masterclass in how to enjoy bad movies. And above all, it’s a reminder that in the cosmos of cinema, even the smallest stars can shine just as brightly—if not for their brilliance, then for their bumbling.

Next time you find yourself in the mood for a dose of delightful disaster, give “The Humanoid” a spin. You might just find yourself joining the ranks of its ironic admirers, ready to defend its place in movie history, one laugh at a time.

Watch the full movie below:

https://youtu.be/U8vE_i5CmMQ?si=QMDAbvWV6OqFZxu8